Kevin Essett Death ;Pastor Of City Church Indianapolis, Indiana Committed Suicide :With heavy hearts, the family of Kevin Essett announces that Kevin passed away today. Kevin Essett took his own life. This was his last statement on Facebook ,where he stated was he was passing to mental health issue Regards! I passed my breaking point a long time ago. I’ve been operating from a place of brokenness for as long as I can remember it seems. I’m told I wear “it” well – whatever the hell that means.
I’ve been told that I don’t look like what I’m going through, and while there may be some truth to that, it’s not a consoling truth. It’s almost like saying, I look good dying.
In life, I’m the one that gives gives gives – even when I don’t have it to give – I give, but too often it’s to people who wouldn’t give to me even when they have extra so you KNOW they’d never sacrifice anything on my behalf.
Even in church, I am the wounded worshiper whose gifts are often exploited for the sake of the church and that’s regardless of the painfully obvious and apparent open wounds that I bear. I’ve concluded that what I produce is far more important to them than I’ll ever be. To them, if I show up and do what I do I must be good. It’s crazy to be told, “i’m glad you’re doing better” when I can’t stop the bleeding inside or the tears outside. If this is better, I can’t imagine worse.
Pastor Kevin is dead, the Minister of Music is on life support and Chef Essett is in hospice. I’m tired and I’m reaching a point where my usefulness is minimal and my light is growing dim. I hate it here. For the time being, his family would prefer privacy to process this. Kindly honor the desires of his family.
